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Fierce Soccer Rivalry Inspires Much Slagging Off Between Blokes

In the latest ad in ESPN’s "It’s Not Crazy, It’s Sports" series, hardcore fans of opposing soccer teams imagine life if the cleat was on the other foot.

Previously, ESPN demonstrated the furthermost extent of its audience’s rabid fandom by showing the cursed life of those who share the name Michael Jordan. (Excepting, of course, Michael B. Jordan—so great on both The Wire and Friday Night Lights.) Now, the cable channel is sending out the same message by showing rival soccer fans cursing giving each other a right cursing out.

In the Wieden + Kennedy-created spot, the latest in ESPN’s "It’s Not Crazy, It’s Sports" series, a couple of blokes tell the viewer how different their lives would be had they been born in the part of Manchester where the other’s team is rooted. With the 164th annual Manchester Derby imminent, pitting Manchester City (The Blue) against Manchester United (The Red), feelings on the matter are especially heated. Both dudes basically rattle off a list of Brit-specific insults that would apply to themselves had they been born with a slight geographic adjustment.

Those who know their U.K. vernacular will appreciate what it means to be called a "tosser" or a "git," but everyone else will have to sort it out through context—or watch the video’s translated version, offered at the end of the spot above.